Feminism
(media.scored.co)
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They would bully each other about whose aromatics were more fragrant and which infusions were correct and which were wrong.
They would call each other hors d'oeuvres, rub butter into each other and let themselves get eaten alive on Youtube. Their last words would be how society needs to be burned to the ground because it was fundamentally rooted in rotten cannibalist culture. Meghan Trainor would jump in a vat of bolognese and yell about how a woman can be any antipasti she wants because #MisogynyIsTheMainCourse and every magazine would cheer how brave she was and how this wasn't about her and how men need to be stopped from eating women. There would be books about how to get men to recognize your value as foodstuffs even though you hate all men for being cannibals. They would demand to be awarded jobs as bakers to normalize how #TheBestChefIsTheMeal, then they would be given aprons and told to show up, but once there most of them would climb into the display shelves with the cakes and pray for someone to come along with a knife. Rules would have to be established for inappropriate consumption in the workplace, and this would be seen as proof of what awful cannibals men are without further training from edible people. Laws would be passed that would send men with untrained palates straight to jail with a show trial for eating a woman, then they would demand that Michelin chefs aren't eating enough of them. This would prove that men are disgusting gluttonous cannibals, while simultaneously proving that men are narcissistic food snobs with unrealistic expectations of their lunch. If a man spoke out about this state of affairs he would be reflexively dismissed as a pathetic starving boy who was just mad because he couldn't get a meal and a medical professional (or journalist) would show up to diagnose him with food allergies, and if he stood his ground and insisted, he would be hospitalized for anorexia. He would probably be admitted by the military, but they would be short-staffed because they would be in the middle of waging a bunch of wars after our news media had decided that half a dozen nations all within the periphery of the Black sea were hateful bigots who needed to be shut down for not legalizing Gorgonzola--so he might get away with just being shadowbanned on Twitter whereupon they would start pumping his news feed full of pictures of women dressed up as Mounds bars. There would be so much more cannibalism but eventually there would be less rape.