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Well you're never going to become supreme leader or achieve any of your ideals because you and your entire race are dying because you refuse to have babies. If that's "disgusting" to you, then I'm afraid you're leaning very heavily into being a jew and acting exactly like how Christ rebuked. You're not without sin, so you can't cast the first stone. Purity is an ideal that should be striven for, but not at the cost of jewish White genocide.