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> Eye contact? Wtf is eye contact? How long do I look at her before I look away? Should I just stare her down?

Eye contact like a non-lunatic is fine.

> How much effort should I put into my appearance?

High.

> I don't give a fuck and my styling reflects this.

That's fine. But don't look slobby and unwashed.

> Wtf do women talk about?

See, if you don't know, talk meta. Talk about what to talk about, ask her what other men talk about, tell her what you think women would want to talk about, etc. Or just ask her questions - what are her interests, does she like dogs, does she have a good relationship with her father, what does she think about social media. Or joke about doing an interview and asking her her biggest weakness.

Just don't be boring. Like sitting there for half an hour with barely anything said, just jamming down the food. I don't think eating is a good first date anyway, especially because it requires talking and eating at once. What, you sit there 10 minutes, then the food comes, then after 40 minutes you start to talk?

You can also just talk about things you are interested in, or explore common interests. But don't rant about something like Star Wars for an hour like a retard.

Don't bring up "hard" topics on the first date.