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The answer is to be involved and share the burdens of life like human families and communities have done forever. It's not about giving money, it's about understanding what your children are going through. Most kids don't want money, they need a social support. That includes your adult children.

A son needs a mentor, not a checked out dad who would rather watch TV and be grumpy all the time. We all need to make the effort to actually connect. Giving money, while helpful, is usually the materialism replacing actual social connection. Is a cop out to make people feel like they are involved.