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“But at last, a stroke of luck! We’ve found the elusive dindunicorn. Camouflaged as a member of a lesser and vastly more common subspecies, this creature is almost impossible to spot unless it reveals itself through word or deed. For example, the ability to hold down a job or to reach the end of a conversation without engaging in assault. This advanced courting mechanism, however, opens it to danger from its own kind, who feel threatened by its maneuvers. Sadly, the dindunicorn (*Homo africanis sapiens*) is rare not simply because of its genetics, but because of predation from the common dindu (*Homo africanis gorilla*).” **~ David 1488enborough**

I can’t. They’re all dead, and I’m too busy beating them.