Let me paint you a completely, totally, hypothetical picture. You're 30, tall, White, smart, good job, in pretty good shape, and lets say you are a solid 7.5 in the face. Not an Instagram chad, but way better then 90% of the scum walking around 70 pounds overweight in the supermarket.
You land one of the very few remaining decent girls out there. She's 25, 8.5 face, thin, White, conservative, sane (impossible I know), not run through, and she's willing to put the work in to stay in shape. You wifed her up ASAP, and now its been about two years. Things have been magical since then, great sex life, few arguments, you are both genuinely in love. It's like something right out of a fairytale.
Then she tells you she's picked up a personal trainer to help her stay in shape.
The record scratch is so loud you can hear it on the moon. Worse, turns out he's also a tall chiseled chad, and you have a full time job and can't puppy-guard your girl 24/7.
Now, dear reader, how the FUCK do you stop what we all know is coming. Preferably without destroying the relationship in the process.
Let me repeat, this woman you've landed is about as good as girls get in America in 2025. She's not politically poisoned, she's not a hoe, she's not insane or ruined by toxic girlfriends giving her bad dating advice. She just happened to bump into this trainer randomly at the gym and didn't even think for a second of how dangerous it could to the marriage.
For the moment lets assume she really isn't a hoe, and she really is just that naïve.
How does one, realistically guys, no over the top internet bravado, tell her to drop this dude to make sure nothing ends up happening. Remember, she's a good girl, but she's still a girl! Logic does not work on them. Relationship stats, or example videos, even more useless. Even bringing the subject up will trigger the factory default "Oh, so you don't trust me!" response 99 times out of 100.
This seems like a Kobayashi Maru scenario to me honestly.
In this totally made up situation, I'd really love my girl for being willing to do the hard work it takes to stay in shape, and I'd go with her as much as humanly possible, but I'd also have a job keeping the lights turned on and could not realistically stop her from getting attention from every swinging dick in the gym, much less the planet. Addressing it at all will mean a fight, I don't see away around that, but if it has to happen then it needs to end with me convincing her that if she spends time with this dude then an affair is just a matter of time.
Before you say it, I highly doubt the "I trust you, I just don't trust him." line will be enough. Threats and honest reminders of the consequences of cheating will also just sound like ultimatums (cus they are), and will just triggering her negative psychological responses, pushing her away when I need to be pulling her in.
And yes, I am well aware that jealously gives women the ick. Perfectly convenient for them, but not so much for the men they cheat on of course.
One more thing. I really, really hate how human psychology works when it comes to these things.
I know I'm asking a lot of Conpro to have an actual serious talk even for just a second, but really, WTF do I do here?
You land one of the very few remaining decent girls out there. She's 25, 8.5 face, thin, White, conservative, sane (impossible I know), not run through, and she's willing to put the work in to stay in shape. You wifed her up ASAP, and now its been about two years. Things have been magical since then, great sex life, few arguments, you are both genuinely in love. It's like something right out of a fairytale.
Then she tells you she's picked up a personal trainer to help her stay in shape.
The record scratch is so loud you can hear it on the moon. Worse, turns out he's also a tall chiseled chad, and you have a full time job and can't puppy-guard your girl 24/7.
Now, dear reader, how the FUCK do you stop what we all know is coming. Preferably without destroying the relationship in the process.
Let me repeat, this woman you've landed is about as good as girls get in America in 2025. She's not politically poisoned, she's not a hoe, she's not insane or ruined by toxic girlfriends giving her bad dating advice. She just happened to bump into this trainer randomly at the gym and didn't even think for a second of how dangerous it could to the marriage.
For the moment lets assume she really isn't a hoe, and she really is just that naïve.
How does one, realistically guys, no over the top internet bravado, tell her to drop this dude to make sure nothing ends up happening. Remember, she's a good girl, but she's still a girl! Logic does not work on them. Relationship stats, or example videos, even more useless. Even bringing the subject up will trigger the factory default "Oh, so you don't trust me!" response 99 times out of 100.
This seems like a Kobayashi Maru scenario to me honestly.
In this totally made up situation, I'd really love my girl for being willing to do the hard work it takes to stay in shape, and I'd go with her as much as humanly possible, but I'd also have a job keeping the lights turned on and could not realistically stop her from getting attention from every swinging dick in the gym, much less the planet. Addressing it at all will mean a fight, I don't see away around that, but if it has to happen then it needs to end with me convincing her that if she spends time with this dude then an affair is just a matter of time.
Before you say it, I highly doubt the "I trust you, I just don't trust him." line will be enough. Threats and honest reminders of the consequences of cheating will also just sound like ultimatums (cus they are), and will just triggering her negative psychological responses, pushing her away when I need to be pulling her in.
And yes, I am well aware that jealously gives women the ick. Perfectly convenient for them, but not so much for the men they cheat on of course.
One more thing. I really, really hate how human psychology works when it comes to these things.
I know I'm asking a lot of Conpro to have an actual serious talk even for just a second, but really, WTF do I do here?
Perfect. Keep it straight and simple.